How to handle Cracks in Marital Relationships

By Prapoorna M

Last Updated: November 27, 2021

Be it a marriage or a potential relationship that we share, it feels great to think them as indestructible ones. Moving past those hardships, we think that any discrepancies that exist would disappear and the strength of our relationships would increase more. But, are they getting so? Are we really focusing on curing those damages caused to our relationship or are we just wishing some miracle to happen overnight? It’s not that you are having all the hurdles.

But those little cracks that were made knowingly or unknowingly in the past or shattered imaginations that we really wanted to happen could have marked some scars deep down there that could be busy working inside. Though we are effectively handling our relationships managing them by not addressing such issues, this lava could erupt one day!

A couple arguing
A couple arguing

Couple therapies exist for such reasons. Though everything seems normal, any hidden differences that we find difficult to address should be talked about and taking professional help makes it easier. What do you think could be the most basic steps of the cracks that could really damage the pillars of your marriage one day? Well, they are not so unreal or hard to imagine. They are the basic things that we usually ignore to notice. Let’s discuss some of them.

Know more: Marital Bliss: How to Make Your Marital Life Blissful?

Communication

It is a common thing to expect from a partner that one should be an effective communicator of feelings. In fact, words gives beauty to the feelings inside. Imagine those beautiful lines that describe your partner being so lucky to have you in his/her life and the mesmerizing softness in those sweet expressions. Aww, feels so poetic, isn’t it? But, practically life could be something different. Our partners or sometimes we, in fact, many of them are not good communicators.

For instance, What if your partner has those feelings for you that are beyond words, but annoys you, irritates you, argues with you, makes fun of you nicknaming, and laughs at you while you feel so bad but trying to hide that frustration and disrespect? Isn’t this a better example of miscommunication? One way your partner could be thinking that you enjoy such teasing but never gives it a serious thought that it might hurt and on the other you could feel so sick of him that he just neglects what your eyes or facial expressions conveyed. The damage that such instances could do to a relationship is huge. Not addressing such gaps might hit your relationship like a typhoon.

Also read: Better ways to communicate in relationships

Comparison of Common vs. Effective Communication Strategies

Common StrategiesEffective StrategiesDescription
IgnoringActive ListeningActive Listening involves fully concentrating, understanding, responding, and then remembering what is being said. It’s not just about hearing the words but also about paying attention to non-verbal signals and emotions behind the words. This approach shows respect and can help your partner feel valued and understood.
AssumingClarifying QuestionsClarifying Questions are used to ensure understanding and to dig deeper into what has been communicated. Instead of making assumptions about your partner’s thoughts or feelings, ask questions to clarify their point of view. This can prevent misunderstandings and provides an opportunity for your partner to express themselves more fully.
AvoidingDirectly Addressing ConcernsDirectly Addressing Concerns means tackling issues head-on rather than avoiding them, which can lead to resentment and distance in the relationship. It involves expressing your needs, feelings, and concerns openly and respectfully to your partner. This strategy encourages honesty and transparency, fostering a stronger connection and problem-solving together.

Know more about the How to regain the lost trust in the relationship?

Add Some Color

Adding color to your relationship does require effort from both of you. When the life canvas feels so dull, color it pink with love. Keep the spark alive between you both by trying out new things together, and creating new experiences everywhere you could, including your bedroom. Doing little enjoyable things together without other interruptions like phone calls, emails or visitors, totally works!! The first memories you created with your partner should help you remember the necessity of continuing them. Trying out new methods of expressing your love towards each other, new conversations, new destinations and creating new memories help you engage more.

Read more on our article The best hobbies for couples in a relationship.

Activities to Rekindle the Spark

ActivityBenefits
Date NightsIncreased Bonding: Regular date nights offer a dedicated time for couples to connect, communicate, and enjoy each other’s company without the distractions of daily life. This focused time together strengthens emotional bonds.
Adventure SportsShared Excitement: Participating in adventure sports or activities that both partners find thrilling can lead to increased adrenaline and euphoria, which are often associated with romantic attraction. This shared excitement can bring couples closer.
Learning a New Skill TogetherGrowth Together: When couples take on the challenge of learning something new together, be it a language, a musical instrument, or a culinary skill, they not only grow individually but also as a couple. This shared growth fosters mutual respect and admiration, enhancing the relationship.

Sexual Compatibility

It is quite common that everyone’s sexual desires are different. But if you and your partner are putting it off for more weeks than before, then you might be upping the chance of one of you feeling rejected and unwanted. Sexual compatibility is important for a healthy marital life. In case, your preferences in enjoyment vary, it is always important to communicate about it to your partner. Make them aware of how you want and what you like it in that way.

Don’t expect them to understand or guess without you hinting nothing. Healthy sex can make your marriage a success when you are really unable to break the ice in some instances.

Don’t be always the giver of love or the receiver of it. One should play both the roles for making things work. Psychologists say that the combination of physical and emotional intimacy that is reserved only for you both is what makes your marriage more meaningful. You both deserve to be best and you should work for it.

Explore more on Lack of Sexual intimacy in Relationships

A loving couple
A loving couple

Time heals

Nursing old wounds is essential to make your relationship better. There may be some past history of major abuses of trust and freedom, maybe regarding finances or fidelity, something or some wrongdoing that you are unable to forgive. But being able to forgive your partner can lighten your heart and lessen the burden on your head. Such deed can make you feel better. Talk about such issues and make terms between you both. If you feel that you might be hurting each other’s feelings, it’s better to consult a psychologist that you can trust who can be your marriage counselor. Remember, there’s no shame in seeking help, in fact, it’s a wise thing to do.

Read more on our article: How to handle Cracks in Marital Relationships

A crack, though camouflaged with floral decoration, remains a crack. Cementing it with your love and commitment, gives the strength to the palace of your marital life. Identify what is bothering your marital relationship and make it better with help of a marital counselor. Wellness hub has a curated list of counselors that are friendly, empathetic and non-judgmental. Log on to Wellness hub and book an appointment with a counselor of your choice, now.

Know more: Anger management in Adults | Controlling Anger

Conclusion

In the journey of marriage, addressing the cracks that may form over time is crucial for maintaining a strong and healthy relationship. This article has highlighted the importance of communication, adding new experiences, sexual compatibility, and the power of forgiveness as foundational steps to repair and strengthen marital bonds. It reminds us that ignoring the small issues can lead to larger problems, but through conscious effort and open dialogue, couples can navigate through their challenges and emerge stronger.

Wellness Hub stands out as a vital resource in this endeavor, offering access to counselors who are empathetic, non-judgmental, and skilled in helping couples navigate their marital issues. Whether it’s addressing communication gaps, reigniting the spark in the relationship, or working through deeper issues, Wellness Hub provides a platform for professional support. Seeking help from a counselor can be a wise and effective step towards healing and enhancing the quality of marital life, ensuring that the relationship not only survives but thrives.

Frequently Asked Questions:

1. What are common signs of issues in a marriage?

Common signs include lack of communication, constant arguing, diminished affection, feelings of resentment, and sexual incompatibility. Recognizing these early can help address problems before they escalate.

2. How can communication improve a marriage?

Effective communication involves expressing feelings openly, listening actively, and responding empathetically. It helps in resolving conflicts, understanding each other’s needs, and strengthening the emotional bond between partners.

3. Why is trying new things important in a relationship?

Introducing new experiences can rekindle romance, create lasting memories, and break the monotony of daily life. It encourages growth both as individuals and as a couple, keeping the relationship vibrant and engaging.

4. What role does sexual compatibility play in marital satisfaction?

Sexual compatibility is crucial for physical and emotional intimacy. It involves mutual understanding, respect for each other’s desires, and open communication about sexual needs and preferences, contributing to a fulfilling and happy marriage.

5. How can couples address sexual incompatibility?

Couples can address sexual incompatibility by openly discussing their sexual needs, preferences, and concerns without judgment. Seeking professional help from therapists specializing in sex therapy can also provide strategies to enhance sexual compatibility.

6. What is the importance of forgiveness in a marriage?

Forgiveness is essential for healing and moving forward in a relationship. It involves letting go of resentment and hurt, understanding each other’s perspectives, and working together towards rebuilding trust and intimacy.

7. How can couples therapy help in resolving marital issues?

Couples therapy provides a safe space for partners to explore their issues with a professional’s guidance. Therapists help couples develop communication skills, resolve conflicts, and strengthen their emotional connection, leading to improved relationship satisfaction.

8. What is Wellness Hub, and how can it assist couples in marital distress?

Wellness Hub is an online platform offering access to professional counselors who specialize in marital therapy. It provides couples with the resources to find empathetic, skilled, and non-judgmental support for navigating marital challenges and improving their relationship health.

9. Is it necessary to seek professional help for marital problems?

While some couples may resolve issues on their own, seeking professional help can provide new perspectives, strategies, and tools for overcoming challenges in a relationship, making it a valuable step towards healing and growth.

10. How can couples make the first step towards repairing their relationship?

The first step is acknowledging the presence of issues and the willingness to address them together. Openly discussing the desire to seek help and choosing a suitable therapist or counseling service like Wellness Hub can initiate the journey towards reconciliation and strengthening the marriage.

About the Author:

Prapoorna Mangalampalli

M.Sc., M.A., (Dual Masters in Psychology & English) – Counselor (6+ years of experience)

Prapoorna armed with a passionate dedication fueled by dual Master’s degrees in Psychology and English, Prapoorna sheds light on and elevates human experiences. Over 6+ years of experience fuel her insightful approach to counseling, offering profound empathy and guidance across diverse areas like online, marital, relationship, child, family, and career counseling.

At Wellness Hub, she thrives in a team environment that values innovation, compassion, and achieving results for their clients.

Connect with Prapoorna to learn how she can help you or your loved one find their voice and build a brighter future.

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