Advice for Newlyweds | Tips to a great marriage

Marriage is the bond of togetherness and lifelong companionship. Both should work to make it work, really better. When you’re newlywed, everything seems to be merry and bright, colorful and light. But, for some of you, these initial days could leave perplexed at everything and it takes time for you to adjust with one another. To be frank, the first year of your marriage is always a learning and transitional period. This seems like a roller coaster of fun and frustration. But this is when you’ll learn to adjust in your life and to give importance to the necessary things.

Here is a list of tips for you to make your marital life more meaningful:

Respect the differences

First of all, understand that you both have many differences in your life style as you are from different backgrounds and brought-ups. Members of a family, friends in a group, or even the fingers of your hand are not alike. Hence, learn the differences and respect them to live peacefully.

Wish Each other

Start every morning with a smile, kissing and wishing a good morning. Make it a habit that you wish each other. Say nice things while they leave home. This makes their day and it is really important.

Explore on our article Good habits for your relationship

Communicate Well

Communication and trust are as important as commitment. Marriage is a life-long commitment and to maintain that, you need to have a good communication between you both. The way how you communicate with your spouse and how you allow them to get decided in this first year of marriage only. Hence, make sure that you communicate your needs, wants, and your dislikes too, in a nice way.

Never go to bed angry

In case you had an argument or conflict in mind, speak to your spouse on that. Never leave a conflict unresolved. Try to bring it to a point like drawing a temporary solution before the day end.

Know more about our article Anger management in Adults | Controlling Anger

Conflict Resolution Steps

Step	Description	Example
Step 1: Identify the Issue	Clearly define what the conflict is about.	Example: “We disagree on how often we should go out versus stay in.”
Step 2: Express Feelings	Share how the issue makes each partner feel.	Example: “I feel neglected when we don’t spend quality time together.”
Step 3: Listen Actively	Each partner takes turns to listen without interrupting.	Example: Partner listens and repeats back what was heard to ensure understanding.
Step 4: Find Common Ground	Identify areas of agreement or shared goals.	Example: “We both agree that spending quality time together is important.”
Step 5: Brainstorm Solutions	Come up with possible solutions together.	Example: “Let’s plan one date night in and one night out each week.”
Step 6: Agree on a Solution	Choose a solution that works for both partners.	Example: “We’ll schedule our date nights on Wednesdays and Saturdays.”
Step 7: Implement the Solution	Put the agreed-upon solution into action.	Example: Both partners share responsibility for planning the date nights.
Step 8: Evaluate the Solution	Review how the solution is working and adjust if necessary.	Example: After a month, discuss how the arrangement is going and make any needed changes.

Don’t let others poke in

In view of your marriage, everything that relates only to you both should be between you and you both should decide. Never let any others to poke in between. Even if this has to involve your parents, talk to them and understand the things. Deal with your parents and let not your spouse handle alone. You should always be a bridge so as not to allow any conflict between them and should make things smoother. This reduces a huge burden on your spouse

No New Changes

Marriage itself is a big change in life and both of you will try to adjust to all those new amendments. So, don’t try to bring any other changes like shifting house, changing jobs, joining new religious congregations etc., within six months. This could disturb your peace.

Financial Issues

Maintain transparency over financial issues. Discuss with each other on the income and expenditure of the family. Plan everything including the savings. Taking loans from your in-laws triggers conflicts between you both and builds low opinions. So, never go for that. Both should consider working, not only to keep the wolf away, but also to earn some financial independency and to maintain that self respect. A combined financial success always helps.

Explore the guidance offered through WellnessHub’s blog on financial planning

Plan and Get that

Plan big for your future and career goals. Both should work on them collectively, be with each other and help each other to achieve your dream goals.

Read more: How do You Know You’re Marrying the Right Person?

Parenting

Enter parenthood only when you both got adjusted and well acquainted with each other as a couple. Bringing a child into this world, takes a lot. Prepare yourself well enough before you take that big decision.

Learn more on How to build emotional connections and maintain positive relationships with children?

Share the load

You can show that you care, when you share the load such as washing the laundry, cleaning the utensils, dusting the house, and try cooking etc., without leaving it to your spouse completely. Such ways of expressing your love, means a lot.

Also Read: Marital Bliss: How to Make Your Marital Life Blissful?

Discuss before Decisions

Always discuss on making decisions. Never make a decision on your own without the consent of your spouse, and think you’re surprising him/her. This would lead to a big trouble. Remember, Surprises are simple things like gifting a bouquet or planning a dinner, but not big decisions like buying a car or house, or like giving up a job or aborting pregnancy.

The ‘We’ Time

Give the “we time” to each other. The precious gift you could give someone is your time, which never comes back. Keep your phones and other gadgets away and be with each other for some time, daily. This is highly important, at least till kids show up. Then you both will eventually plan to have some
personal time, together.

Explore more on Are You Still in Love With Each Other? | Never Neglect To Say It

Keep it Hot

Keep that intimacy ignited, always. That’s what makes you a couple and keeps away the conflicts between you both. Put off everything and keep your mind relaxed and focused while enjoying those special moments of being together.

Know more on Relationship factors: 10 things that are more important in a relationship than sex

Never for Granted

Don’t take your partner for granted. This could bring some negligence over the other, going further. Keep in mind why you started this journey together. Treat each other like it’s a privilege to be married to
each other.

Respect their borders

Every person maintains some boundaries with the other. Respect the boundaries that your spouse specifies and never try to cross them. This is an essential thing that every couple needs to follow.

Give and Take Respect

Treat each other with respect, especially in public. The way how you treat your partner, reflects on how you are. Though it’s not a harmless banter, those hurt feelings are inescapable.

Be logical and Rational

Keep the discussions logical and rational. Don’t let everything turn into an argument. Focus on the solutions rather than the shortcomings. In case, you are going into an argument and things are getting hotter, cool it off with a laugh or admit that you give up. Quitting doesn’t always mean you’re lost.

Be There

Stand for each other, no matter what. You both are a pair and let the rest of the world stand against you. There are many couples who stand by others and let others come between them. Don’t be that person. Remember that you both are a team and always maintain that.

Be Sensible

Understand each other through different scenarios. Keep your eyes on the horizon but don’t trip over your feet. Have long term relationship goals and let that bond be intact. Selfless love is the most meaningful way to express love towards each other. Remember that everyone needs praise and encouragement for each other. Have a date night every week and dance together. Observe the elders who are married for several years and understand the positive qualities in them that keep their married life fruitful. Have reasonable and realistic marriage expectations and make them come true.

In case you both are having unresolved issues and if trying that, results in arguments, take a step towards couple counseling to make your relationship better by improving your communication. Seeking help from an expert would help you in many ways throughout your marital life. Book an appointment with our expert and trained professional counselors to make your marriage more meaningful.

Weekly Marriage Check-In Guide

Day of the Week	Check-In Topic	Goals	Notes
Monday	Financial Planning	Review budget, plan for savings/investments	Discuss any upcoming big expenses
Tuesday	Household Responsibilities	Assign tasks for the week, plan meal prep	Note any changes to regular schedules
Wednesday	Work/Life Balance	Discuss work stress, plan for personal time	Plan a date night or a quiet evening together
Thursday	Communication & Feelings	Share any concerns, express appreciation	Highlight positive moments from the week
Friday	Future Goals	Discuss long-term goals, personal and together	Talk about steps to achieve these goals
Saturday	Leisure & Fun	Plan weekend activities, hobbies to share	Choose activities that both enjoy
Sunday	Reflection & Appreciation	Reflect on the past week, express gratitude	Discuss what went well and what can be improved

Conclusion

Marriage, a journey filled with learning and adjustment, requires both partners to actively contribute to building a strong, loving relationship. Emphasizing the importance of communication, mutual respect, and shared responsibilities, it’s essential for newlyweds to navigate their initial year with understanding and patience. Key strategies include respecting each other’s differences, maintaining financial transparency, sharing household chores, and prioritizing intimacy and quality time together. These actions help in laying down a solid foundation for a happy and enduring marriage.

For couples facing challenges, WellnessHub offers a valuable resource, providing expert counseling to improve communication and resolve conflicts. Utilizing such professional support can significantly enhance the marital experience, ensuring that couples have the tools they need to grow together and strengthen their bond. By embracing these practices and seeking assistance when needed, newlyweds can look forward to a fulfilling and resilient partnership.

Frequently Asked Questions:

1. What are the key principles for a successful marriage?

The key principles for a successful marriage include understanding and respecting each other’s differences, effective and open communication, mutual support, financial transparency, sharing household responsibilities, maintaining intimacy, and making decisions together.

2. How can newlyweds maintain a strong bond in their marriage?

Newlyweds can maintain a strong bond by starting each day with positive gestures, resolving conflicts before going to bed, ensuring financial transparency, sharing daily chores, prioritizing intimacy, respecting each other’s boundaries, and spending quality time together.

3. Why is communication important in marriage?

Communication is crucial in marriage as it helps partners express their needs, desires, and concerns, fostering a deeper understanding and preventing misunderstandings. It is the foundation for trust and a strong emotional connection.

4. How can couples manage financial issues in marriage?

Couples can manage financial issues by maintaining transparency about their finances, discussing income and expenditures, planning savings together, and making financial decisions collectively to avoid conflicts and build a secure future.

5. What role does intimacy play in a healthy marriage?

Intimacy plays a pivotal role in maintaining the connection and attraction between partners. It goes beyond physical aspects, encompassing emotional closeness and shared experiences that strengthen the marital bond.

6. Why is it important to share household responsibilities?

Sharing household responsibilities is important for fostering equality and teamwork in a marriage. It shows respect and consideration for each other’s workload and contributes to a balanced and supportive home environment.

7. How can WellnessHub help strengthen marriages?

WellnessHub can strengthen marriages by providing professional counseling services that help couples improve communication, resolve conflicts, and understand each other better. Accessing these resources can lead to a more resilient and fulfilling relationship.

8. When should couples consider seeking professional counseling?

Couples should consider seeking professional counseling when they face persistent conflicts, communication breakdowns, or feel disconnected from each other. Professional guidance can help address these issues constructively and strengthen the marital bond.

9. How can respecting each other’s boundaries improve a marriage?

Respecting each other’s boundaries is crucial for trust and personal space in a marriage. It involves acknowledging and honoring your partner’s limits and comfort zones, which promotes mutual respect and understanding, essential for a healthy relationship.

10. What is the significance of ‘we time’ in a marriage, and how can couples ensure they have it?

‘We time’ refers to dedicated moments spent together without distractions, fostering emotional intimacy and connection. Couples can ensure they have ‘we time’ by scheduling regular date nights, engaging in shared hobbies, or simply spending quiet moments together. This dedicated time strengthens the bond and reaffirms the commitment to one another.

About the Author:

Prapoorna Mangalampalli

M.Sc., M.A., (Dual Masters in Psychology & English) – Counselor (6+ years of experience)

Prapoorna armed with a passionate dedication fueled by dual Master’s degrees in Psychology and English, Prapoorna sheds light on and elevates human experiences. Over 6+ years of experience fuel her insightful approach to counseling, offering profound empathy and guidance across diverse areas like online, marital, relationship, child, family, and career counseling.

At Wellness Hub, she thrives in a team environment that values innovation, compassion, and achieving results for their clients.

Connect with Prapoorna to learn how she can help you or your loved one find their voice and build a brighter future.