Loneliness is a suffocating feeling of being alone, often accompanied by self-pity. The feeling of loneliness can occur in many situations, like relocating to a new place, getting divorced or having a breakup, or the demise of a closed one. Sometimes we feel lonely when our partner doesn’t understand us or avoids us for other reasons. Loneliness in relationships is an essential point to address. Psychologists suggest some tips for those who feel lonely. You must get out and fight loneliness. The lack of belongingness to a particular place or person often triggers loneliness.
Though you are alone, you need not feel lonely; sometimes, despite having many people around, we would feel lonely. It happens so because the social connection is less. Here, the concept is not about social media and being online all the while; it is about meeting and greeting people offline, face-to-face. In these busy days, the time spent online is more than in person. Such reduced association with the people around triggers loneliness. Social isolation is the main cause of loneliness in the world, making most of today’s population feel lonely.
How can you identify loneliness in a person?
Though a person doesn’t agree that they are feeling lonely, it can be identified with their lifestyle and the effect that loneliness shows on them. The symptoms often visible when a person feels lonely can be as below.
- Feeling empty
- Unstable moods
- Unable to sleep
- Lack of appetite
- Thoughts of death
- Suicidal tendencies
Though you cannot diagnose their loneliness, these symptoms can make you understand that they have bad days. If their lifestyle represents a loner, these symptoms can give additional information.
What thoughts will lonely people have?
People who feel lonely have mostly negative thoughts. Loneliness eats up their soul. They feel very secluded and abandoned, even in a gathering. They don’t feel they belong. People with loneliness cannot see the problems of others as they are already engrossed in self-pity. In such cases, their thoughts are like this:
- Nobody invites me anywhere
- Nobody likes my company
- I always need to be indoors
- I’m not important to anyone
- They don’t like to talk to me
- I’m never a part of this group
Harmful thoughts cause loneliness. Also, such thoughts further increase loneliness. It becomes a cycle, and they cannot come out of it. In most cases, the reason for loneliness lies deeper, and the attitude of low self-esteem and low confidence results in loneliness.
Why do I feel lonely?
To know why loneliness occurs, you need to ask your emotional self what is happening within you. Emotional injuries, imprints of previous mishappenings or bad experiences can greatly impact you. It is often not just one thing that can result in loneliness. A cluster of events or a chain of emotions triggered in you can cause loneliness.
Why is it important to reduce loneliness?
When you feel lonely, it is important to take help because you will deal more intensely with your thoughts and emotions. The impact of stress that loneliness creates is huge, which doesn’t allow us to see the solution in front of us. It can further create internal pressure that increases loneliness even more. So, the feeling of loneliness just eats up from the inside. It is important to fight loneliness for both physical and mental health. Fighting loneliness reduces self-pity, promotes confidence, and increases our efficiency at work and our quality of life.
Tips to fight loneliness
Are you feeling lonely lately? Do you want to come out of this gloomy feeling and have bright days ahead? Here are some tips that help us fight loneliness.
You think so!
Our main thought of overcoming loneliness helps us to come out of it. If you think of overcoming loneliness and getting some change in life, you can do it. But for this to happen, you need to leave the clinging recurring thoughts that make you feel lonely. Often, emotional hurt or lingering fear makes us feel lonely. It is important to address such underlying issues. Having open communication helps. You may take some professional help if needed. Once they are resolved, you can refocus on the good things for you and open yourself up to new activities.
Accept your loneliness
Accept that you feel lonely to understand that loneliness is not a synonym for being unproductive and boring. You need to accept that but not feel sorry for yourself to come out of it. Say to yourself that you are going to deal with this. Sensitivity, empathy, and self-love are more important than self-pity.
Treat yourself well
If you think you cannot have fun alone and stay inside all the while, then you need to eliminate this thought. You can have fun taking a stroll in a park, dancing to a nice song, reading a book, or doing your favourite hobby. Spending time in nature, watering plants, and watching birds and the sunset is good. For all this, you need no company. Start bringing these changes by setting a timetable. Come out of your shell.
Greet others with a smile
You come across many people in our day-to-day life if you consciously notice. The watchman of your apartment, the liftman, the newspaper boy, the hairdresser, the clerk at the supermarket, or maybe your neighbour! Greet them with a smile. Try having little conversations about everyday things like the weather, news, or something in your locality. If they continue the conversation and you cannot speak further, try to listen. Anyone who listens to others and sometimes reveals personal things feels like belonging. You may try it slow if you feel hesitant in the beginning.
They need you too!
You should know the astonishing fact that there are many people out there feeling alone. They need companions too. They are also trying to make contact and have a social life. You may find them in your neighbourhood, at your sports club, or maybe at a gym. You may later know that the person you greeted yesterday wants to converse with you. With rolling conversations, you will know that there are people who need us and are important to us. How about easing your tensions a bit and letting the contact slide?
Are you feeling alone due to a breakup?
It is very common to feel alone after a breakup. You must adapt to the situation, which will take a certain time. It is like a transition period. Hence you have to remember that this loneliness will not last long. If you think you need to talk about it, then it is good to open up about it. You may choose a friend or a family person if you wish to. Even self-help groups and therapy talks may help. But a session with a relationship expert can help you much better to come out of it healthily and lead a better life.